Sexual Healing by Dr. Margarita Kressin

When I was doing my fellowship in Los Angeles, a patient came in (let’s call her Anna) who has never had an orgasm in her life. She certainly was quite distressed about it the older she got, and the more she and her girlfriends talked about it. She felt she was missing something. She was married with two kids, a loving and supportive husband, and quite successful professionally.

Anna had some abuse issues in the past and made some relationship mistakes. She had her meeting with our psychologist who found out other psycho-social issues that could be contributing to her problems. She was told to continue counseling with the psychologist.

She then saw my mentor and me. She exercised, ate healthily, and was a picture of health. She underwent nerve testing as well as blood flow testing, and we found her sensation was somewhat deficient.

She then saw our physical therapist to deal with her pelvic muscle to see if this was contributing. They were normal.

We then sat down and gave her the news. Some psychological issues needed to be worked on and, unfortunately, there was nothing to attribute to her decreased sensation. There wasn’t a magic pill we could give her to make the orgasms happen.

After explaining to her that up to 25 percent of patients do not orgasm*, one, she was surprised; and two, she was willing to do anything to not be in that 25 percent.

She was surprised since everywhere she looked — TV, magazines, movies — everyone seems to be having orgasms … and in concert with the guy! If everyone is doing it, why can’t she?

Our clinic in Los Angeles was a self-pay clinic**. Her bill was $2,600. How much are you willing to pay to find your orgasm?

* Paik A & Laumann EO (Chapter 2.1) Prevalence of women’s sexual problems in the USA. Goldstein I, Meston CM, Davis SR & Traish AM Eds. Women’s Sexual Function and Dysfunction. Abingdon: Taylor and Francis, 2006;23-33.

** Many clinics in California are turning into cash pay because of the HMO environment.